Uncategorized

The Hard & The Holy

“Please hear me, Girl: The world has enough women who know how to do their hair. It needs women who know how to do hard and holy things.”
– Ann Voskamp

Well–I love this quote.

Life right now is full of lessons (nothing out of the ordinary there, I suppose), but they all seem to be centered around the idea and–more challenging–the act of sacrifice.

It’s not particularly fun, but it’s the uphill climb to get to the summit. And I know my sacrifices are small in comparison to much of the world, but it’s still my journey uniquely, and right now I’m tired because it’s hard.

I try to remind myself as I make final preparations to leave one life season and style for another, that once I’m there, I’ll be able to appreciate and value it that much more–knowing the cost it took to get there.

Because I want to be a woman who knows more than how to do my hair.

So I’m embracing the sacrifice and discovering the increasing springs of strength to grow in my journey through the hard and holy things God has called me to do.

“Blessed are those whose strength is in you, in whose heart are the highways to Zion. As they go through the Valley of Baca they make it a place of springs; the early rain also covers it with pools. They go from strength to strength; each one appears before God in Zion.”
-Psalm 84:5-7 ESV

Standard
Monthly Review

Ten Month Review

Life is full of countdowns right now, so even counting the total months I’ve been doing this project feels like a conclusion. 

How do you feel about the project? 

Ten months would feel like more of an accomplishment if I were on track with everything I originally set out to do. I don’t know why, but I can’t seem to just let it go!

What have you learned? 

Hmm. It’s funny how as the project has progressed, learning has gradually become more abstract.

I’ve been currently learning about how to live, and love, and give of myself, and end things well. People keep asking me what are the one or two things I really want to do before leaving Michigan. And really the only thing that comes to mind is finishing well–in work and in relationships. And, well, I wanted to go salsa dancing at least once more, but I’ve just gotten that one out of the way this past weekend. It was wonderful.

What do you like?

I like being unconventional and doing things that many other people only dream about. Not because I don’t want others to have great experiences and accomplish their dreams, but because it feels like confirmation that I’m living fully and chasing after opportunities and won’t regret it.

What do you not like?

Being unconventional is scary. Doing “an alternative graduate school experience” is all alternative and hipster and cool until it involves quitting your job, selling all your things, cutting ties, etc. Granted–those are mostly voluntary choices–but still. There are times I think I’ve completely lost my mind and will never be “successful” because of the choices I’m making right now. But then I just tell that voice to be quiet and go away because it’s not telling me the truth.

What are you looking forward to? 

I’m really looking forward to the experiences and learning I’ll have on the road, particularly in meeting new people. (I can’t believe I’m even saying that–I’m so not a people person.)

I’m investigating some volunteer opportunities for while I’m traveling, and I’m very hopeful that some of them will work out. It’s bizarre to think of not working, but I’m very excited about the thought of being able to give my time and energy to the things that are important. (Not that I don’t think my jobs are, as well.)

Standard
Uncategorized

I Quit!

areyoulivingyourdream

The past weeks have been full of so much that I won’t try to recap for the blog; I’ll just pick up with where the journey has brought me thus far. (Also, be on the lookout for my 10, TEN, month review at the start of July next week.)

When I decided last fall to embark on this journey, I didn’t have much foresight into what it would hold. I did expect to be able to accomplish all the “assignments” which I now realize was a tad overambitious. I knew I was definitely interested in traveling around the world, but honestly, that part of it didn’t feel so real. I told a select number of people about the plan, and I talked about it with confidence, mostly trying to convince myself that it would really happen. As time progressed, I think I’ve had every emotion under the sun about the trip.

And now, just yesterday, I gave my workplace my resignation notice so I guess it’s official!

I’m really not sure what else to say about that.

I’ve had so many different emotions about resigning and leaving Michigan over the past year, and it’s completely surreal that it’s happening now. It feels empowering to embark on this trip, but it also feels overwhelming and all consuming, like I’ve just plunged myself into the waves of the unknown and now I’m not really sure which way is up. I know I’ve made plenty of other decisions that have changed the course of my life, but this decision just felt so final. At one moment I had complete control, and the next I felt so … exposed. I certainly wasn’t expecting was to feel so emotionally raw and spent after resigning.

But it’s absolutely and completely wonderful, too. I’M LIVING MY DREAM!!!!

!!!

Can’t believe it.

In the coming weeks, I’m really going to try to get back to blogging. Now that the end is so near, I have a renewed energy to push myself to the finish line, and I hope to accomplish a decent amount of things that are still on my list for this project. I’ll also have a lot of tips and info I’ll share about round the world travel, as I’ve learned so much over this past year about that. I’m also considering keeping the blog alive as I travel, but it’s been so touch and go over these past few months I’m not sure if I will be able to blog consistently once the project is actually over.

In any case. In conclusion, this quote has been reassuring to me as I commit and begin. Go begin something today! And let me know about it in the comments, if you please. 🙂

GoethesFaust

Standard